Peer relationships provide children opportunities to learn about self and develop new social skills. During the early years, children tend to focus more on who should be their friends. I recall talks with my daughter about how to choose her friends. First, I encouraged her to think about the type of friend she wanted to be, how she wanted others to treat her. Next, select friends who demonstrated those qualities/character traits that she felt important. Even so, there were times she felt sad about one friendship or another over the years.
Most children experience peer relationship difficulties, such as teasing and rejection, at some point in their lives. However, during her middle school years, peer relationship issues become more complex. Parental involvement during middle school years is also important. I had to admit I did not know all of the answers about how to deal with peer pressure. What is peer pressure? Peer pressure is a term used to describe the influence a peer group has to change an individual to conform to the group.
When my daughter was in middle school, one of her friends told her that she dressed "too nice" for school. So, she started wearing jeans to school every day. I was somewhat concerned about her change in attitude regarding style of clothes. When I asked her about my concerns, she did not want to talk about it at first. However, later into the school year, she told me why she really stopped wearing dresses to school. I then realized how quickly she was growing up.
There are times when children might not want to discuss certain things with parents. One way to encourage healthy peer relationships is to help children develop responsible attitudes about things that matter most.
Parents can assure their children they will be there to listen, and provide whatever support they can. Children who experience enduring negative peer relationships during later years may be at risk for future adjustment problems, such as delinquency, depression, and anxiety.
Parents might not always know all of the answers about how to deal with peer pressure. Parents do not have to feel alone. When dealing with peer pressure, parents can talk with other parents, research ways to deal with peer pressure, and get involve at their children's school. Parents can talk to their children about things that might be going on at school. Parents can help children come up with alternative ways of dealing with different kinds of peer pressures. Parents can invite their children's friends over for pizza and maybe play some board games. When possible, include children in family decision making. Children need to know parents value their opinions. Including children in family decisions help build their self-confidence. Children are less likely to experience peer pressure when they are confident about where they stand on issues. Sometimes parents can just remind children about choosing their friends wisely!
If you enjoyed this article, visit my educational blog at http://www.childrenlearningtips.com to read more about how to encourage children to learn.
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