How Do You Decide Which Parent Stays at Home With the Kids?

How Do You Decide Which Parent Stays at Home With the Kids?
Many parents prefer to have one parent home with the kids. It's a good idea in my opinion, as it cuts down or eliminates the need to pay for daycare and you get more time with your children. And while having a stay at home mom or dad won't work for every family's situation, it's something worth considering.

The first challenge may be deciding who is going to do it. It's not as simple as "dad works, mom stays at home." That may in fact be your solution, as it often is, but you're better off really thinking about which parent is going to stay home. Here are some factors to consider.

Who Wants to Be the Stay at Home Parent?

First and foremost, consider which of you wants to stay home. If one parent absolutely has no interest in giving up his or her job, there's no need to consider that part further. An unhappy stay at home parent is rarely the best choice. You may sometimes have to push matters if that's the only way to make finances work, but it's best to look at all the alternatives first.

Who Has the Best Skills for Staying at Home?

To me, this isn't just about parenting. I'm quite sure most moms and dads can handle the basics of parenting just fine. Admittedly, a breastfeeding mother has one skill the dad will never have, but if her job makes pumping breastmilk possible, it's not necessarily the one point to base your decision on.

It's also not just about keeping house. It may take a while to get into the habit of caring for the family home if you're not used to it, but once again, that's something most people can handle.

You should consider comfort level for each parent as well. It's usually easier for a mom to stay home because that's the common expectation. Stay at home dads are increasing in number, but they're still relatively unusual, and that can be an uncomfortable situation. Dads often have that little extra bit to deal with as stay at home parents.

What I would suggest considering as well is whether one parent has a good chance of working at home while the kids are there. Sometimes one parent or the other has a job that can be relatively easily transitioned to something home based, or is more interested in starting a home business. If you can get one parent home with minimal loss of income and/or benefits, that's a nice place to start.

Just make sure that the parent looking to work at home has really considered the challenges of doing so with children in the house. Most people aren't as effective at working when they're also watching the kids unless that's their job.

Whose Income and Benefits Are Most Necessary?

If neither job can be brought home, you have to consider which one is most needed. The income is important, but so are benefits such as health insurance. A job that pays a little less upfront may be more important to your family because your health coverage relies upon it.

This is also a good time to consider what will happen if the parent working outside the home is laid off. It's one of the biggest reasons why I like working at home. My husband was laid off a few years ago, and it took about six months for him to get a new job. If I hadn't been earning money from home, we would have been in a lot more financial trouble.

Think About the Long Term

Sometimes a job with a lower pay rate may be the better one to keep because it has more potential for the future. Sometimes taking a break from a job is too risky because your industry moves fast, and a break in your resume will make it much harder to return when the kids are older. These are factors to consider as well.

Of course, not every family will consider each of these points equally important. Some won't want the at home parent to work at home. Some will simply prefer the traditional arrangement, and will cope with any challenges that creates as they come. These are simply some points to consider when the decision isn't obvious right away.

Stephanie Foster runs Home With the Kids as a resource for stay at home parents. Get some ideas on coping as a stay at home parent when you need to earn money from home at her site.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Stephanie_Foster
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